(Sorry about the unannounced absence, folks. The Korean hosted three little Korean Nephews from Colorado Springs for a whole week, and then the Korean visited the Korean Girlfriend at Aspen for a week. Hope all of you have enjoyed some nice vacation time.)
Dear Black, Hispanic, and White People:
My name is the Korean, the host of a popular blog of Ask A Korean! The Korean keeps the blog in order to edify non-Koreans, and more generally non-Asians. That means you. The Korean had been thinking that he was making good progress, but visiting a region in America mostly populated by you people made the Korean realize that more direct approach is necessary. Therefore, the Korean presents the behavioral guide of interacting with Asian Americans.
- When you meet an Asian person in America, listen to the person's English. If it's fluent, assume the person is American. Do not say "Oh, your English is so great!" unless you want a punch in the face.
- Do not ask "Where are you from?" to an Asian person unless you are reasonably certain that s/he is outside of his/her American hometown. If the Asian answers, say, "Los Angeles", do not follow up with "where are you originally from?" or "where are your parents from?" Our precise ethnicity is none of your fucking business. Do we ever ask you whether you are from Dominican Republic, Ireland, or Ivory Coast?
- Do not holler any Asian celebrity name at any Asian person. The Korean is 6'1", and plays basketball frequently. If the Korean hears one more "Yao Ming!" from one of you, he will shove a basketball up your ass.
- Do not say "gonnichiwa" to an Asian person in America, unless you are absolutely positive that the Asian person is a Japanese tourist, or you are a host/hostess of a Japanese restaurant greeting an Asian customer. (Although if you are a host/hostess, the proper greeting would be iratsaimashe.) There are relatively few Japansese Americans in America compared to Chinese or Korean Americans, so you are most likely wrong; and if you had been reading the blog, Korean people really don't like being mistaken for a Japanese. Chinese people are not all that different either.
- On second thought, don't say any Asian phrase to any Asian person, unless you are at least conversational in the language. It's the 21st century, people. We are no longer impressed by your amazing ability to say "hello".
- As a corollary, especially don't say any Asian phrase to an Asian American woman in the hopes of hooking up. Your schemes are as transparent as they are idiotic.
- While we are on the subject, although equal opportunity dating is to be encouraged, blatant yellow fever is disgusting. Nothing drives Asian women away faster than your submissive girl fetish. Plus, if you really think Asian women are domestic and submissive, you obviously haven't dated one.
- Let's change the subject a bit. Stop patronizing expensive Asian restaurants with shitty food and fancy decoration. (Way too many of them in New York.) You are just as stupid as the Russian people who wait in line for hours to eat at McDonald's. Recognize which Asian food is rightfully fancy, and which one simply has a fancy name and a $30 price tag.
(True story: The Korean went to this one chic Korean restaurant in SoHo, where they made every effort to make it seem trendy and, well, not Asian, down to 100 percent non-Asian waiting crew. We had barbecue, and one of the waiters offered the Korean a platter of "Seng Shew". It took about 10 seconds to realize that he pronounced "sangchoo", i.e. red leaf lettuce, as if he was reading French. The Korean broke a soju bottle on his head, and never returned.)
- Do not use chopsticks if you are going to make a fool of yourself and spray food all over the place. Use a fork. No one cares.
- On the other hand, if you are at a Thai restaurant and don't have chopsticks, do not act all high and mighty and ask for chopsticks. Thai people don't use chopsticks.
- On a broader topic, stop fetishizing Asian culture, like its movies and cartoons. Like everything else in the world, some Asian movies and cartoons are fantastic, and some are just plain shitty. As the Korean mentioned before, he cannot believe the number of people who liked Bicheonmu on imdb.com, which is generally considered the worst Korean movie of the decade, perhaps all-time, on the same level as Battlefield Earth.
- However, stop copying excellent Asian movies/TV shows, replacing Asian actors with white actors, and sell them in America as if you came up with that brilliant idea. Martin Scorsese, the makers of The Ring, The Grudge, and Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, the Korean is looking at your direction.
- Do not make an Asian person around you a representative of his/her race. Do not ask questions like "Why are Korean girls so slutty?" or "Why are Chinese people so loud?" because the answers will be either wrong or incomplete. Do you know all there is to know about your heritage? Neither do we, for the most part.
- But if you must ask, send an email to askakorean@hotmail.com
p.s. Asian people, anything else that annoys you? Please email.
-ADDENDUM: 2:37 p.m. Sept. 11, 2007- One more thing the Korean thought of (because some idiot just pulled this): If you meet a Korean anywhere, never ask "North or South?" North Koreans have no freedom to travel outside of their country -- that's what it means to have a communist dictatorship. The only place that you will likely meet a North Korean is within North Korea; at that point, you wouldn't really have to ask. Everywhere else, all Koreans are South Koreans.
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
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75 COMMENTS:
This is brilliantly funny and very true.
Very good! I can personally attest to points 1 and 2. I was adopted when I was 5 months old and have lived in Colorado ever since. Yet the number of times I've been told that "my English is very good" fucking baffles me. It's just plain rude.
I like this one a lot. I have e-mailed the link to some of my Asian American friends and family.
Nice job, very funny. I am half-Korean, look full and don't speak much Korean at all. I have lived in California my whole life and have never had anyone tell me that my English is very good. I think I wouldn't be able to hold in my laughter if someone did.
very handy list! which scorsese movies are ripoffs?
Loved it! Funnily enough as a monolingualwest african i agree with a lot of those points, with some substitution of course. Do you ever get the question "I have friends in [insert random asian country here]. Do you know them?" Irritates the livin' daylights out of me...
Yellow fever in guys annoys me and I'm not even Asian.
And don't forget The Lake House, that mediocre remake of Il Mare.
Funny. You should contribute to a facebook group "Allegiance of Asians being tired of stupid questions". Can't agree on the North/South Korea point. My ancestors were from North Korea, who illegally immigrated to the Soviet Union, so I can say, that originally I am from the North. Anyway, it doesn't undermine the stupidity of the question itself
hear hear!
The movie thing...well...
I disagree.
The collaborative nature of film is what allowed Kurosawa to learn from Leone, who in turn learned from Kurosawa. Similarly, we wouldn't have had Star Wars if it had not been for Lucas's keen eye toward Kurosawa.
I don't mind filmmakers aping other filmmakers, especially if we get excellent results from it.
Actually, maybe we should allow some blatant yellow fever to persist. Maybe some of our girls can whip these pasty boys into shape and bend them to the Asian will.
Yeah, I hate being asked North or South, especially because the answer is usually irrelevant to the one who asks. I've learned not to hate anyone who asks this with undying enmity, however.
This attests to my ignorance. I had no idea the Thai didn't use chopsticks. Fortunately for me I didn't have to learn this the hard way, since the only Thai I've had is take-out and I have my own chopsticks (thus I've never asked for them from a Thai restaurant).
i know that asking north or south is rude, but every korean i meet seems to tell me a story about his/her family escaping from/still stuck in north korea. Perhaps I am a magnet for this because of what I study (North Korean Foreign Policy), but this makes for really depressing and akward conversation. What does a white girl from suburbia say after you tell her that your family is being tortured in dissenter prison camps?(answer:nod & make concerned face)
Kate --
Although those conversations probably happen at the most inopportune and unexpected times, you study North Korean foreign policy for reason right? Find a way to incorporate what people are willing to share with you -- it's not that common to have family tragedies revealed to strangers. Just accept that people want to add a personal element to your studies. It could be a blessing in disguise.
been through a lot of those, thanks for listing them. (Also possible in Germany)
I'll copy some into my blog
Hi there. I have blatant yellow fever, and my korean girfriend is both domestic AND submissive. But then I guess I just got lucky.
Hehe, quite true, especially the yellow fever and asian girls comment.
I hated being asked if I was Chinese and it'd take them ages to figure out that I'm actually Vietnamese (embarassingly though, I found out that I actually am part Chinese >.< but it was kinda annoying that they asked in the first place...like it actually mattered..)
I also hate this idea of an asian group. People don't seem to understand that some asians do stick together because it is easier to speak or relate to each other...
I enjoyed The Korean's post on things that non-Koreans shouldnt say to a Korean. But as a non-Korean white person, I have a list of things Koreans shouldnt say or do to non-Koreans
1) SOME of us can actually speak your language fairly well. So if we greet an FOB Korean in his or her native langauge, please do not reply in broken English. Especially if your English sucks (despite the fact that you've been here 20 years and have had ample time to study English) and our Korean skills are pretty good. Just use Korean. SOME of us spent our time wisely while we lived in Korea -- i.e. learning your langauge, instead of drinking and whoring, which, unfortunately, too many white guys do in Korea.
2) Same thing if we order food in Korean at your resturant in North Jersey. Yes, some of us can indeed speak Korean fairly well. Dont just snicker and think all we know is An Young Ha Sey Yo. Again, our Korean is likely better than your English, if you are a recent FOB, I mean.
3) When we get in a taxi in your country, please do not give us a lecture on how SOFA is unfair. We already know that. We didnt write the agreement.
4) Please do not give our Korean girlfriends a dirty look when you see them with us. Yes, at one time in Korea, it was true that most Korean girls dating white guys (U.S. soldiers, for the most part) were prostitutes, or "yankee yoja." But that time was over decades ago. We care about our Korean girlfriends a great deal (we also respect our girlfriends' parents and family).
5) When we ask you which part of Korea are you from, dont just assume we are asking that stupid North or South question and answer "South Korea, of course." LISTEN to what we are asking, dont just assume we dont know the difference between North Korea and Korea. We were asking you WHICH CITY IN KOREA ARE YOU FROM???? SEOUL??? INCHEON???? DAEGU????? DAEJON???
6) Dont serve us jajang myun and pretend its good food. That's like giving an egg role to a Chinese. They would spit it out!
I understand The Korean's frustration, because I have experienced the reverse, both in Korea and in North Jersey and NYC.
kimchiguy,
While the Korean admires your familiarity with Korean language and culture, your kind is few and far between. (Definitely much more so than Asian Americans.) Cut the fobs some slack. The list you provided read like the private diary of Hendrick Hamel.
But how dare you insult jjajangmyeon! That's almost a ban right there.
well its sort of like this with me and some of the FOBs:
I go into a Korean resturant and order in Korea. They giggle in my face. I continue to order in (grammatically correct, for the most part)Korean. They giggle again and answer me in (very grammitally incorrect)English. I continue speaking Korean, but they act as if they are in a forest and a tree is speaking to them. Trees are not supposed to talk right? Therefore this white dude must not be speaking our langauge. No no no...He must be from the South or something and is speaking English but I just cant understand his accent. Meanwhile, they turn and speak Korean to my FOB Chinese wife, who doenst speak a word of Korean and resents being assumed to be Korean, as she looks VERY Chinese.
Anyway that was the case in Fort Lee, where we used to live. And this happened several times a week, as we've hit most of the resturants there (you're in NYC right, Korean guy?)...
But now that Im in the DC area, I havent experienced this as much, for reasons unknown.
Oh, and Im not insulting jjajangmyun as such. It's just that Korea has much higher quality food to boast of. So I'm not against jjajangmyun, although my wife, an FOB Chinese (for clarification when I mentioned Korean GFs in the last post, I was refering to something from several years ago)is personally insulted by the idea of jjajangmyun, as are pretty much all FOB Chinese I know, who equate jjajangmyun with egg rolls. I think you might have the same reaction if you went to a bulgogi place in Osaka. All the side dishes taste weird, the kimchi tastes weird, etc. Same idea.
Thank you. I will be sharing this with all my non-Korean friends.
Who insulted Chajangmyun? The bastardized Korean version of Chajang noodles is quite possibly the tastiest food on earth! That man is lucky he didn't insult patbingsu, or I would have to find him and hurt him.
I get the same as Kimchiguy for the language thing. I feel like Ed the talking horse, everything I say is comedy central..I could be talking about the weather..it's mad funny. Talk about how I am in Korea but I don't teach English..mad funny.
I was asked to do a show for SBS 그것이 알고십다 for being able to speak Korea fluent, eat kimchi so damn well and use chopstick.."I'm almost Korean!" I think a slap in the face would have stung less.. I have been in almost all my life (Dad was USAF).
I wonder how that would fly back home if I roll up into K-town and said the same..Damn! you eat Burger King! You're almost American! LOL
I suppose you could say, well this is a generalizing right. But from what I read, that's what your blog is about..how not to get caught up with that. Anyway, all your points were valid and even a few of the family that were not stationed over here still ask my girl(Korean) stupid stuff, but she usually schools them right away to nip it in the bud. I'm sending the link to the blog to a few people that come to mind ;) good work Korean, keep up the posts.
-Ed The Talking Horse Busan
Jajangmyun is awesome btw! sure you can get the cheap 2000 won crap, but the good stuff with roasted baby octopus with shrimp and extra spicy! It takes all hands down.
Hello "The Korean", Ive read some of your posts, this being the one I wanted to comment on, so in the spirit of cross-cultural issues and debate don't take my words as mean. We don't live in a utopian world society (thank god) and we have different views but it takes communication to make sense of individuals different take on things (i.e culture).
SOOOO lets get to the dirty talk ;)
I am a white suburban male from NY. And I TOTALY understand where your from on this post. American white culture is somthing to behold indeed. But after a few years of research and self exploring Im not going to be too hard on whites as I was in the past. Now this is not to say the majority of whites have a cultural handicap, cause I frimly believe they do, but "White" despite how real it seems and effects our lives in america (i.e the 2008 presidental race) is imaginary. White does not exist except in the minds of men, so its an unseen force that impacts social reality and thought, in other words white is a culture. Being a culture, it can effect EVERYONE then since its within any capable humans grasp to enculturate into it. Ive seen 1st hand the americanization, which is whitification(since for some stupid reason whitness is the unspoken normalcy of america) being acted out in west to east, central europe to east, south asia.
true seeing a bunch of wapanese fags debase an entires cultures history to anime gets me extrmly pissed, but this superfical treatment I have experinced in other parts of the world being a white american. It does get anoying when everyone thinks you live life like a frat boy, or can go to a resturant with constantly getting bland food (thai resturants, indian,korean) cause other whites have a traditional bland diet (in terms of spice use in foods), seeing everyone ware disney shirts despite what kind of a company and message they send out. I can go on and on and have my post even more garbled but lets just say It effects everyone not just whites. Its popular and just for a non white in america to point out white peoples faults yes, cause whites in this coutry have an unjust privledge even to this day. But this is only a problem BECAUSE people still think America is the shit and blah blah land of the free and blam whites for alot of stuff. But trust me im not attacking you, Im very frustrated how my ancestors gave up there native cultures to assimilate into being "good americans" way back when. But once you get over america being the end all of the places to be, you can see american and white culture in specific is actually not so bad! I hate to admit it but I cant deny what I have seen and learned. Japan for instance, EXTREAMLY XENOPHOBIC job market, not to mention many establishments with sigs for no forienrs. Say you want to make ur hope in japan as a white, your gunna have a hard time and plus face the extream xenophobia you face here in america as a non-white such as the places youve been to. Even though american culture is shit, at least you can "get into" it but still east asia is rather hard for non asians. Even though I <3 Korea, and am a fan of the theory of cultural relitivity, try giving blood there as a non-korean and see what happens! You will get turned down (even though they test everyones blood anyway for impurities).
Im not knocking any of the examples I listed, every society has its norms and they will seem odd or different to a non-native, but just I feel its important that as we need to put more of a focus on whites, we also have to keep in mind why it even happens with whites in the first place, there are bigger issues at foot then sheer stupidity ;) But I cant be to howtie towtie I live close to NYC and flushing queens so IM lucky to have the exposure to the cultures I do. Mid-westeners ehhhhhhhh I feel bad for them.
One time I got lost in Kyoto Japan, some really offbeat area where they havent seen whites since ww2, and it was cute cause poepl would all stare and look and I passed by a resturant and an entire group of elderly people started pointing out of a window and waving! It was a cool experince cause if you grow up as a "white" in the USA you raaaaarley have the opprotunity to be an ousider or an oddity. But keep[ in mind mr.korean, whites DONT have that opprotunity yet so always be proud of your non-whitness and make them feel stupid (but willing to guide)for not knowing whats up with non "white" culture... sooner or later more will get the hint :) But we have to keep an eye on Asia too cause with so may girls getting eye lid opening surgery, collored contacts, and so on clearly a cultural value is replacing an existing one and that is being proud of your natural self. Sorry for running on enjoy the story of typo-s I just gave you.
"Don't ever speak to a Korean in Korean."
Wow. You're a bit of a snob, aren't you? Koreans like to say hello to me and I don't mind. Oh, look. It's a bunch of other Asian-Americans that agree with you. And nobody else. You guys are really open-minded.
Bob I like your point! With what "The Korean" Said "Dont ever speak korean to a non-koream"
I hgave to say its mounting evidence that "The korean" Is a total Bah-nah-nah or twinkie. This sort of state ment could have ONLY been made by someone who is a native born american, or someone who knows nothing of Korean culture in Korea. Either way someone is improperly displaying the voice of the real koreans in korea and its ironically "the korean" :)
The "North or South" question was very funny! ㅎㅎ
Here in the Philippines, we also do not use chopsticks ^^
Before i read all the posts i was in love with Korean culture (at least the very few i know about)and now i´m sad.
I´m from Mexico and, well about you asian people hate about being asked about you and stuff well i want to say something, maby you hate foreigns and our stupid cuestions or interest about you and you´re culture, maby we or I am the stupid one that wants to know people and like asian guys (cuz im a girl btw)and personally i will be thriled if a foreign of ANY part of the world says or at least tries to says "hello" in spanish, i will be exited to teach others about my culture or music or personal intrests, at least it´s better to be asked 1000 times the same shit about where are you from or whatever than beeing hated or ignored.
Many people don´t like asian people, now i know why.
We latins are very lovable with evryone.
I personally like them/you asian people physically and in SOME cultural ways and i never, never will mind if any foreign person ask me anything in order to know more about me or my country.
*Sorry about my english, hope you don´t hate me because of that.
Mafervolta, hola mi amigo. Dont be to mad at "asians".
The ones that come from America are two types. The ones who feel like they are in a special club and you can never talk about it, and the nice ones who want to share culture with everyone. The korean like I said before I think MIGHT be a platanos. Looks asian but acts like your average white kid. The real koreans in korea are extreamly nice and friendly and love sharing culture. So dont take american koreans(the bad ones) to much to heart, most koreans dont look at american koreans as koreans anymore anyway. But in america its odd you know how raciest this place is, all ethnic groups get into pack mentality and become xenophobic.
bob,
If you bothered to finish the sentence you quoted, you may have noticed that the statement is qualified by the following clause: unless you are at least conversational in the language. Also, if you bothered to read the right sidebar of the blog, you may have noticed the Korean is a Korean American. What Korean people in Korea do has no application.
mafervolta,
Puede escribir en espanol si quiere. El Coreano no odio curiosidades sobre cosas coreanas. Esto blog se llama "!pregunte a un coreano!" Claramente me gusta recibir preguntas.
andwhenwebreak,
Your first comment made no sense, and your second and third comments dared to question the Korean's authenticity, especially when the Korean clearly stated his background in the front page of this blog. The Korean does not tolerate that. You have been warned.
To the Korean.
Im sorry My first comment didnt make sense, I had one of them moments where you just bash the keyboard angrly ;)
But I have to totaly disagree with you that being a korean american has nothing to do with it, and that what koreans do in korea is of no importance either.
To a degree I will give you the fact that ethnic groups in america exist in a different dimention then they do other places in the world. BUT I will say in this case I dont think ur owning up to how much it really does matter being of korean heritage to say "an asian guide for non-asians" is in order. Im not trying to attack you so sorry if I came off that way. But as a fellow american you can attest to the effects of ethnicity and race play in our culture. Koreans just didnt poof into existace here in america so its my informed oppinion that being tied to that ethnic group (of koreans in korea or not) does matter in how you inform your own identity as an american and as an "asian" ( I hate clumping such diverse cultures into one lable, but in America you HAVE to do it most of the time or no one understand you). Im just saying DONT think being from korea has nothing to do with what korean is, look what happened to the "whites". Sure everyone thinking white is great, the best of the best, but everyone who is considered "white" had to totaly ignore and throw away their culture. Just look at italians here, they always boast being italian blah blah but italians in italy just dont even consider them italian.
But "asians" arnt immune to this effect either. My heart breaks when I see beautiful girls dye there hair blond, whare makeup ment for a white complexion ( not being racial this is from an a color mismatch point of view), waring blue contacts...... essentialy trying to look caucasian.
Anyway Ill write a billion pages, Im a sociologist so I have an unhealthy atytention to ethnic/cultural/race issues so dont mind me.
andwhenwebreak,
The Korean doesn't think you understood his point. The Korean's point is that this letter is meant to be a (joke) guide for non-Asian Americans to deal with Asian Americans.
So, for example, some commenters have said something like "why do you get annoyed at XYZ when Korean people in Korea do the same XYZ?" And the Korean's answer is: "It doesn't MATTER if Koreans in Korea do the same XYZ -- this is for Asian Americans." That's it.
A separate point here -- the Korean would believe that you had no ill intention, but don't call an Asian American a twinkie or a banana. Few insults are greater. The Korean barely held back the urge to ban you straightaway.
Hello again guys!!
andwhenwebreak:
Thanks for make me notice about the 2 tipes of korean, i think both are special but in different ways.
And thanks to you i´m no longer mad at them LOL.
And BTW, you said: Hola mi amigo and i´m "amiga" cuz i´m a girl, ;)
The Korean:
*Gracias por permitirme hablar en español, intento hablar en ingles para que todos me puedan entender y aunque estemos o no de acuerdo contigo se reconoce que tienes un muy buen blog. Felicidades!!
*Thanks for allowing me to speak in spanish, i try to do it in english in order to be understanded by everyone and even though we agree or not with you let´s face it, you have a very cool blog. Congratulations!!
For All:
Thanks to everyone i´m learning so much n___n
The Korean,
haha Im sorry about the "twinkie or a banana" if it upset you I was just ribbing you. I will keep this in mind but Im from an area where its pretty commonly used by all (asians and not)to poke fun at the "dilution" of ethnicity in America. Im in lower NY, and I get called an egg some times, I really cant think of a point where it was ever used in a bad way. But this is not to take any validity behind you choice to think of it as an insult (whats so bad having white on the inside?Not ALL white people are bad;). Ill keep this in mind, but it was meant to be joking not mean.
mafervolta:
perdon por el error, yo no sabía qué sexo usted era :)
I'm going to say this, though I'm sure it's been said again and again. It simply cannot be said enough times.
DO NOT say an Asian phrase to a passing Asian girl. Okay, I admit that I was impressed when a Hispanic dude said, "Annyeonghasseyo," mostly because it wasn't "Ni hao" or [dear god] "konnichiwa," but it got old after I hit 15, believe me.
Oh, wow. It's so true. I personally am not Asian, but I have a very good friend, who's name is Dahye. (She's orignially from Korea.) And, people will say these completely inconsiderate things. I know sometimes people aren't doing it deliberately, but I sometimes really want to cup my hands over my face and walk away. Your blog was absolutely hilarious, but everything you said was so typical of the typical American.
As someone who is trying to learn Korean on her own, I know how embarrassing it can be to try and talk to someone in Korean when I know so little. I can read the words on menus but I'll be damned if I'm going to try and sound high and mighty saying them :) I can certainly appreciate The Koreans point here. Also, on a related note, I worked with this sweet Vietnamese woman named Trinh (to me, a fairly obvious Vietnamese name) and if I'm remembering correctly her last name was actually Nguyen (unmistakably Vietnamese as far as I know). One day This sort of regular customer was sitting at the counter and to get her attention he said Konnichiwa! and I actually blushed *for* her. At a bar I worked at there was an Asian guy sitting near me and the guy I was there with. I had no idea where he was from (or even if he was actually foreign) but as me and my friend were talking about Korea... my friend leans over and asks the guy *in Korean* if he speaks Korean. The guy was Japanese and did not stay long after that :( I know these things are often harmless mistakes, but I agree with The Korean that unless you know the person (KNOW them), try not to make an ass out of yourself. I do my best, but out of my own vague yellow fever I can't help but get curious after I've known someone a while! (It's shameful I know) But I am super polite about it and just so curious :)
The Korean, very amusing blog entry. Too bad some of your readers are having such a hard time picking up on your satirical streak.
To non-asians or non-Koreans who feel victimized by Koreans who don't give them credit for their attempts to speak the language. Uh . . . been in the US lately when an immigrant has an accent? Folks here are merciless! Let me also say that I am Korean American and (1) my relatives in Korea schedule comedy festivals centered on my poor pronunciation, (2) the Korean language contains far more intonations that can change the emotional or definitional content of a word or phrase so having a mere technical understanding of grammar does not a fluent speaker make. It's a crap (unnecessarily difficult) language to learn in that respect so while you may think you are proficient, chances are you sound like a Korean Corky from Life Goes On. Hence the laughter/giggles. Hey if I can suffer through the ridicule, so can you. And call me when someone has said some things that are so hateful based on your race that a little piece of you dies inside. "The Korean waiter made fun of my accent!" Tears are flowing for you over here buddy.
"Where are you from?" I am a bit perplexed by this question whenever it is asked. Simply because I never see the person again. I wonder if they are storing the information in a massive Asian Faces database somewhere. I've had white folk on the train just ask me out of the blue, "Are you Chinese?" with a look of eager anticipation on their faces, like they're going to win Jeopardy or something. Or that I will exclaim, "Sh*t you are one amazingly perceptive white man! You guessed it! Here's a coupon to China Pavilion restaurant on K Street for you and the wife! And while you're at it, can you use your powers of perceptions and let me know if this is cubic zirconian or a real diamond?" What is this urge to know? Is it like walking outside, seeing a dog and asking the owner, "Is it part border collie? I see a little german shephard in it, am I right?" I have a bit of advice for those who REALLY need to know: get to know the person and perhaps the information will come out in the natural course of conversation. "(30 minutes into the conversation) So, my grandparents are corn farmers in Iowa. Oh really? Your grandparents are rice farmers in Korea? Very interesting." See how this is a more facile technique rather than the more clinical: "Give me your genus, species, blood type, racial phenotype. Pronto!" It's called being a human being. Try it.
Yellow Fever. It's always a bit amusing to me when I'm walking down the street with my non-Asian friends who are suffering from the fever. They'll see an Asian chica who is a complete, unadulterated, down-home, Grade A, bomb sniffing, dawg (woof, woof) and my feverish friends will trip over themselves trying to get in her pants. I always ask them, "Dude, do you SEE her?" Of course whenever someone fetishizes a thing or a person they don't see the actual core or essence of the thing or person. What my friends are fixated on is the archetype/stereotype of Asian women. It's like those people who drive those cheap Pokemon sized Mercedes Benz. "Hey, at least I own a Benz!" It's harmless fun I say because if the girl is stupid enough after the first week to stay with him then she deserves it. "Chinese, Japanese, whatever, you Vietcong all look alike to me, just get that sweet asian butt over here!"
So, heart to heart? I am a Korean-American with an American citizenship. I am being approached by multiple white women from Ireland, Germany, England, and Australia. How much should I charge them for a green card? White guys, what's the going rate? Thanks for your input!
Hahahahahaha! Just change the perspective to a foreigner living in Korea and the Koreans being the ones saying and doing all the stupid shit, then you're on to something Mr. Korean. Seriously, I thought you made a few typos at first, then I realized you were actually targeting stupid white, hispanic, and black Americans. Hahahaha! This is too funny.
Examples are in order:
--When you meet an Asian person in America, listen to the person's English. If it's fluent, assume the person is American. Do not say "Oh, your English is so great!" unless you want a punch in the face.-- Can be changed to...
When you meet a Western person in Korea, listen to the person's Korean. If it's not fluent, assume the person can't speak Korean well. Do not say "Oh, your Korean is so great!" when all the Westerner said was "안녕하세요" unless you want a punch in the face.--
--Do not ask "Where are you from?" to an Asian person unless you are reasonably certain that s/he is outside of his/her American hometown. If the Asian answers, say, "Los Angeles", do not follow up with "where are you originally from?" or "where are your parents from?" Our precise ethnicity is none of your fucking business. Do we ever ask you whether you are from Dominican Republic, Ireland, or Ivory Coast?-- Changes to...
When you ask "Where are you from?" to a Western person, be prepared to hear the same question asked back to you. We know your fucking Korean, so don't say "I'm from Korea." Say your from Busan, Daegu, Seoul... Got it?
--Do not holler any Asian celebrity name at any Asian person. The Korean is 6'1", and plays basketball frequently. If the Korean hears one more "Yao Ming!" from one of you, he will shove a basketball up your ass.-- Changes to...
Do not holler any Western celebrity name at any Western person. Westerners look the same to Koreans, but we are different. If this Westerner hears one more "Bruce Willis!" or "Brad Pitt" from one of you, he will shove a black market dvd up your ass.
--Do not say "gonnichiwa" to an Asian person in America, unless you are absolutely positive that the Asian person is a Japanese tourist, or you are a host/hostess of a Japanese restaurant greeting an Asian customer. (Although if you are a host/hostess, the proper greeting would be iratsaimashe.) There are relatively few Japansese Americans in America compared to Chinese or Korean Americans, so you are most likely wrong; and if you had been reading the blog, Korean people really don't like being mistaken for a Japanese. Chinese people are not all that different either.-- Changes to...
Do not say "hello" to a Western person in Korean, unless you are absolutely positive that the Western person is someone you know, or you are trying to get a date. There are relatively few Westerners in Korea who like random people to approach them for impromptu English practice, so you are most likely pissing them off.
--On second thought, don't say any Asian phrase to any Asian person, unless you are at least conversational in the language. It's the 21st century, people. We are no longer impressed by your amazing ability to say "hello".-- Changes to...
On second thought, don't say any English phrase to any Westerner, unless you are at least conversational in the language. It's the 21st century, people. We are no longer impressed by your amazing ability to say "hello".
--As a corollary, especially don't say any Asian phrase to an Asian American woman in the hopes of hooking up. Your schemes are as transparent as they are idiotic.-- Changes to...
As a corollary, especially don't say any Enlgish phrase to a Western woman in the hopes of hooking up. Your schemes are as transparent as they are idiotic.
--While we are on the subject, although equal opportunity dating is to be encouraged, blatant yellow fever is disgusting. Nothing drives Asian women away faster than your submissive girl fetish. Plus, if you really think Asian women are domestic and submissive, you obviously haven't dated one.-- Changes to...
While we are on the subject, although equal opportunity dating is to be encouraged, skinny Korean men dating obese white girls is disgusting. Nothing confuses white men more than your fat girl fetish. Plus, if you really think fat women are great, you obviously haven't considered why skinny white men don't date them.
--Let's change the subject a bit. Stop patronizing expensive Asian restaurants with shitty food and fancy decoration. (Way too many of them in New York.) You are just as stupid as the Russian people who wait in line for hours to eat at McDonald's. Recognize which Asian food is rightfully fancy, and which one simply has a fancy name and a $30 price tag.-- Changes to...
Let's change the subject a bit. Stop patronizing expensive Western restaurants with shitty food and fancy decoration. (Way too many of them in Seoul.) You are just as stupid as the Russian people who wait in line for hours to eat at McDonald's. Recognize which Western food is rightfully fancy, and which one simply has a fancy name and a 30,000 Won price tag.
--Do not use chopsticks if you are going to make a fool of yourself and spray food all over the place. Use a fork. No one cares.-- Changes to...
If you're all so good at using chopsticks, why do you wear bibs when you eat 삼겹살 or 닭갈비? Can't you eat without making a fool of yourself and spraying food all over the place?
--On a broader topic, stop fetishizing Asian culture, like its movies and cartoons. Like everything else in the world, some Asian movies and cartoons are fantastic, and some are just plain shitty. As the Korean mentioned before, he cannot believe the number of people who liked Bicheonmu on imdb.com, which is generally considered the worst Korean movie of the decade, perhaps all-time, on the same level as Battlefield Earth.-- Changes to...
On a broader topic, stop fetishizing Western culture, especially the English language. Do you really want your children and grandchildren to be speaking Konglish? Seriously, I saw an advertisement for cell phones with the Konglish word 컬러 (pronounced: color) instead of the Korean word 색 (pronounced: sek). Use your own damn words, or you may lose them.
--However, stop copying excellent Asian movies/TV shows, replacing Asian actors with white actors, and sell them in America as if you came up with that brilliant idea. Martin Scorsese, the makers of The Ring, The Grudge, and Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, the Korean is looking at your direction.-- Changes to...
However, stop copying excellent Western music, replacing English lyrics with Korean ones, and sell them in Korea as if you came up with that brilliant idea. I'm looking at everyone.
That was fun. I tried my best to mirror your thoughts and not simply say everything I could if I were to write an open letter to Korean people. I would have to write a book to that. The point is, as I read your letter, I thought nearly the same things about Koreans in Korea. Stupid people are everywhere...
Don't know why but I feel really stupid right now. My father was full Korean, my mother full German but I identified more with my father and have more Korean traits than German ones. Never learned Korean language because then family could not talk about us/me in front of us. Kamsamnida
I'm half-Korean (half-Yugoslavian), and though I actually don't look Korean, I look fully Asian, and it's annoying when some people I meet for the first time talk to me like I'm a baby, in broken English. It's also annoying when Korean friends of the family get surprised when I know Korean.
I agree with what you said about not asking Koreans if they are from North or South Korea. If I were from North Korea, I would either be brainwashed, starving, or dead―in North Korea. I think people ask this to show how up-to-date they are on geography or something, since most people didn't even know what Korea was when I was in elementary school and junior high.
A few additions:
(This applies to middle-school and high-school students) When classmates with an Asian, don't assume they are extremely smart and then compare your homework, test scores and quizzes with his/hers. In my experience, this often leads to excess whooping and boasting when you happen to score one more point on a test than the Asian, leading the Asian wanting to kick your ass or contemplate suicide.
Don't bug us about hanging out, staying out late, or about how our parents are too strict. We know our parents are strict, and you don't know the first thing about why we can't back-talk our parents or blatantly ignore their commands/rules the way other cultures can.
Don't think all Asians are geeks, or gangsters.
Don't assume Asians are the smartest or best at everything. Although this is flattering, if we do even slightly worse than you in school, and you say, "Wow, but I thought all Asians were smart!" you will be jumped. Of course the majority of Asians in America are smart! The "stupid" or "lazy" ones all stay in Asia, what would they be doing in America? Also, it's because our parents are involved in every facet of life and studying and doing well is the number one priority. But if there are Asians around who just don't try that hard, this makes all Asians in the vicinity uncomfortable and hurts the person's feelings. It's not like we assume all non-Asians are stupid.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA... OMFG. All so true! I get asked that "where are you from" question all the time!! mebe i should ask them where they're from - like really. actually i do. only fair right? freakin' hilarious! thanks! =)
I agree with you completely when you ask a non-Asian to not comment on an Asian person's English even though the Asian would've been speaking only English throughout his/her life. I'm of Indian origin and really don't understand why people keep telling me I speak very good English. Hello, like the majority of the population in India speaks excellent English and they're definitely better spellers than most people in the west. Look at the number of writers we have in the country, that should be proof enough!
But you know, it's really weird because among Indians too, when one meets another in a different country, they always insist on asking "where are you originally from?".
And yea, a foreigner will always say 'Namaste' (it means 'hello' in Hindi, an Indian language) and although it's not as infuriating as the rest of it, it's so presumptuous of them to assume that a person is Indian, I mean he/she could be any other southeast Asian from any one of the countries in the subcontinent - Pakistan, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka etc. Just because we all have similar skin tone and features doesn't make everyone Indian or from any one of the other countries.
And also the Indians living in northeastern India have features like the west Asians do and so they just presume they're from either China or Korea or any of the other countries.
Also, the whole Bollywood phenomenon, it's really lame that they think Bollywood is all about songs and dances. I mean, there's more to Bollywood than just musicals, yea, there is music, but it doesn't mean that there are no serious films. There are actual films just like Hollywood, with a narrative, characters and some darn good movies if they would care to find out. The whole stereotype is crazy. They keep asking any Indian celebrity they interview about Bollywood about how they find the whole song and dance routine as if that were the only thing that defines Indian cinema.
I think this link would illustrate better what I was trying to say in my previous post, the myths about India, it's people, Hinduism, the turban, the bindi (if you don't know what I'm referring to, it's the "red dot on the forehead") etc.
http://forums.civfanatics.com/archive/index.php/t-197521.html
Gosh, the stereotypes are just endless. And the funniest one, that India is full of elephants, snakes and tigers. Haha, have you even been to India?!!!
And also, the world has borrowed so much from India - Yoga, Curry, the concept of Karma (which people just throw around assuming they know exactly what it means) and the weirdest - Chai Tea which everyone thinks is an exotic drink. Come to India and say 'Chai Tea' to someone and it seems really lame because the literal translation of 'Chai' is 'Tea', so you would actually be saying 'Tea Tea', and in India tea is the most common drink apart from water, except in South India where coffee is the most commone beverage. And the chai tea that is really popular in the west is in fact tea spiced with cardamom or cloves and is consumed in every household in India.
And I think this might be true of green tea as well, which is such a phenomenon these days, it's probably the most common drink in west Asian countries, or correct me if I'm wrong, at least most of them I guess.
The worst part is that most people think India has one language when in fact each state in India (India has 28 states and 7 union territories) has its own language and cultural customs. So most people ask me "Do you speak Indian?" and I can't help but just say yea, it gets tiresome after a while explaining the whole story to everyone.
Stereotypes are just ridiculous and so I can totally relate to your post, Korean. It just reminds of all the things I have encountered, it's all so familiar.
@Ed - I loved your mirror job on this post. These things should work vice versa as well.
Personally, even though I found the entry intriguing and funny a few things bugged me like the north/south question. Seems to me like American Koreans all have terrible complexes about their roots and are prickly people to talk to.
Which brings me to another point - the wide-pread phobia (since in there is no better word) of not being affluent in the english language make me angry. Even though I don't know the language of my fore-fathers I regret not studying it since it is a part of me; at the same time I am glad that I speak english since in I don't have this inferiority complex that some (especially korean) for not speaking english. It is true that koreans will lose their beautiful language if they don't stop covetting everything about america.
Koreans also have the annoying habbit of thinking that english is only spoken right if it's spoken with what is their definition of the proper pronounciation - which is an american accent.
I know knowing english is important to communicate with the majority of the world but that's not the reason with most koreans.
Please don't get me started on the crappy insertion of english words into an other-wise solid korean song.
You're korean. No matter how long you've lived in america you're still a korean. So find the beauty in it and move on.
Yumna,
The Korean found at least 20 spelling, punctuation, and grammar errors in your short comment. Stick to speaking English, not writing it.
Very interesting blog. Though you may need help on the Japanese :P It's supposed to be "konnichiwa" and "irasshaimase"
Ari is being an idiot. I wouldn't be surprised if he can't tell the difference between an apple and a pear.
This post gave me an orgasm by the way. I've had people say Gonichiwa to me so many times (with that funny little buddhist hand motion), and I've even been asked if they have TV in Korea. (when I answered "yes", they were dazzled and asked "colour tv?"). Also, some idiots should stop asking me if I'm North Korean.
Funny thing - when I revealed that I'm South Korean, my white friend got mad at me for making nuclear bombs. Hopefully, he's got it figured out by now since he was in grade 6 when it happened.
Haha GREAT article, very funny. But as others have said, the reverse is true for Koreans talking to a non-Korean in Korea.
Personally I don't mind the Koreans coming up to me and attempting to practice their English, I find it cute and funny in a way. Usually I respond with my broken Daegu-dialect Korean in an attempt to get some Hangulmal practice in. Made some really cool friends that way.
As for "yellow fever", where there are at least two distinct types that I've run into being over here. First is the blatant "I love everything Asian" crap the young Americans have when they first get here, it tends to fade REALLY fast once they see what -real- Asia is about. The second is something I'm guilty of, and that is the feeling East Asians are beautiful as a culture and as a people. I won't date American women anymore (well Americanized white culture as an above poster put it) and will probably end up marrying a Korean at some point in time. So be careful with the term "yellow fever".
And yeah, Korean food is awesome.. when I went home back in 2004 (visiting parents) I had a hard core craving for it after two weeks being at home. Do you know how HARD it is finding a decent Korean restaurant in western Louisiana?
Loved it! As for the North/South thing, I hate that question not because of the reasons you listed, but because my father's side was from the north and my mother's, from the south. But my dad's family fled from what was "northern Korea", because at the time, they weren't two separate countries.. it was simply "Korea".. granted it was all under Japanese rule, but whatever. My father never considered himself North Korean or South Korean, even though his family set up shop in Inchon.. he just considered himself Korean. He didn't want that divide because he still considered North Koreans to be part of his family.
That's the answer I usually give to people who ask, and it usually shuts them up right away because they feel kind of stupid for asking. ^_^
"Plus, if you really think Asian women are domestic and submissive, you obviously haven't dated one."
haha~ so true.
oh my god, so many times people have asked me if i'm north or south. gahhh! why are some people so ignorant.
I love one variation of this question that I hearn on the airport (somone else was asked, I am not Korean).
- Are you from South Korea or.... (few long seconds of confusion) the other one?
Priceless.
You should never tell someone their English is good unless you know for a fact that it's not their first language. For example, a good friend of mine is Korean, and she thinks her English is horrible. (It's not.) I tell her her English is really good. But if you meet someone and know nothing about them and tell them that, it's just rude. Some people genuinely don't know 9and mean well), but that would bother me if I were Asian so...those people should just stop saying that. Oh, and don't you hate when people either don't know North Korea exists, or don't know it's communist? I mean, hello! It's only all over the news!
Hilarious and scary accurate post. I am also an ABK.
One of my friends once convinced me to go golfing with him in his home state of Alabama to prove the South is more tolerant.
A Reese Witherspoon look-alike working the desk asked for my name at the first course. When I said, "Yang", she said, "Wow! That's easy to remember and it's not like Wang Fu or something!"
I turned to my shocked friend, pointed to my watch and said, "Twenty minutes. I've been in your state twenty minutes."
Love this! You should also never ask or assume a Korean had some sort of plastic surgery (I also ready that post). I'm Chinese but a Korean lady once asked me if my nose was real. Hmm... lol you're post stirred up the memory.
"On a broader topic, stop fetishizing Western culture, especially the English language. Do you really want your children and grandchildren to be speaking Konglish? Seriously, I saw an advertisement for cell phones with the Konglish word 컬러 (pronounced: color) instead of the Korean word 색 (pronounced: sek). Use your own damn words, or you may lose them."
I hope Koreans take this one seriously. I was watching a K-drama and they used the following English words which I KNOW have a Korean version: test, stress, privacy, fighting, playboy. I have no problem with Koreans using English word for objects or concepts which have no Korean equivalent, like computer but using English words for concepts which Koreans certainly understand is sad, quite frankly.
When I started teaching in a very multicultural school the first thing my students asked me is 'What's your Nasho?' Cute. Means 'What's your Nationality?'
As a White girl from a very White area of Australia, I had a great deal of trouble answering. I didn't want to answer 'Australian' because while most of the students had close family or were born in Lebanon or Vietnam or Samoa, I would have still considered them Australian.
So I answered 'One of My Great Grandparents was born in England, One of my Great Great Grandparents was from Hollend. Most of my family I know about was born in Australia.'
One of the students solved my problem for me.
'So you're a Skip Miss.'
Short for Skippy the Bush Kangaroo.
I guess I shouldn't take it all quite so seriously.
Oh, this is such a "Pot calling the kettle black" situation. I am tempted to print this whole thing out and use it in my advanced class.
So, I've been living and teaching in Korea for 7+years. Here are my favorites, in no particular order, but that happen on a daily basis. (Keep in mind, I have lived in the same apartment, in the same small village, working at the same foreign language high school, in Jeollanam-do for SEVEN PLUSS YEARS.)
Yesterday: At the Nong-hyup ATM-- two college-looking young men at the ATM next to mine: "Hello" Big, smug smile on his face. "Hi" I reply back (there were others watching, otherwise I would have simply ignored the stupid snot). They grab each other, laughing hysterically, in what appeared to be a very intimate embrace, except for the laughter, of course. The other half-dozen people around the 6 ATMs smile approvingly.
At the hospital, still yesterday: While waiting to see the doctor a group of around 6 high-elementary age kids come over, stand directly in front of me, less than 5 feet away, begin pointing and giggling then break into laughter. 3 teachers, I know because I heard them called "teacher" in Korean, watched and encouraged the children to say "Hi" to the "foreigner."
After visit to the hospital: At the only decent grocery store in Yeongsan-po: Three different times local ajjummas begin picking stuff up from inside my shopping cart and inspecting it as though they want to "Know" what the "foreigner" buys/eats/??. All the while, various groups of middle school girls, middle school girls are the WORST, follow me around, literally shouting "Hellllloooooo" at my back. Then giggling... must have the giggling..... After 4 or 5 times with no answer, one group switches from "Helllllooooo" to "Heyyyy! Looooook at Meeeeeee" Nice, eh? Insert heavy sigh here.
And THAT was just YESTERDAY. So, please excuse me if YOU are ANNOYED by obnoxious questions by random passersby. Welcome to my world......
To white folk in Korea who are boo-hooing about allegedly mirror treatment when they are in Korea:
These are completely different situations.
The corollary to your white experience in Korea would be a Korean tourist or student visiting the U.S. for a bit and being made fun of because of his/her heavily accented speech patterns and decidedly Korean mannerisms.
The Korean is making reference to situations where Korean-Americans have made a LIFE here in the United States and the underlying pain experienced (despite the humorous tone of this article) when so called "Americans" (white, black, or latino) marginalize us by asking these questions. We never feel part of the country, always a foreigner.
Take my situation--I was 5 years old when I arrived in Kansas with my family. I've gone to elementary school, junior high school, high school, college (majored in English Literature -- ah the irony), and law school here in America. In that time I was a cub scout, a boy scout, ran track, wrestled, played on my high school football team, drove a piece of crap 1970 Plymouth Roadrunner as my first car, went to prom and lost my virginity, traveled the country, camped in Colorado, hiked Grand Canyon, been arrested for drunken & disorderly conduct a couple of times, served in the Air Force, got into bar fights, was the best man at a wedding, had my heart broken, drank too much at football tailgates, etc., etc., etc. I've had the quintessential American experience with some kimchee and bulgogi thrown in.
While I'm quite proud of my Korean heritage, I'm also American through and through, not because of any indoctrination, but simply because I have lived as American a life as you can imagine in the great Midwest.
While you may think the questions are innocent ("North or South Korea", "Are you Chinese", "You speak English so well"), it brings home the truth that no matter what, you will always be a foreigner and always standing in the margins. "Where are you from" can more accurately be described as Kansas for me and who I am can be described by my friends, family, travels and experiences. My experience is so far removed from some of these questions that these situations become opportunities to learn something about the person asking: that they are uneducated, that they may have led insulated lives, that they've never traveled, that they may possibly be a tiny bit racist, that they see me as an FOB ("Fresh Off the Boat" - bitch I'm wearing me some Dockers!), that they can't get past the way my face looks.
So to say the experience of a white person visiting Korea is even remotely similar is just patently absurd.
Just take The Korean's article for what it is, a humorous observation piece and nothing more. No political statement is being made here, no clarion call to arms is being shouted from the rooftops.
But upon further reflection, perhaps this exchange should happen more: "Your people are from Scotland? Gosh you speak English without an accent at all! Listen buddy, I have to commend you people on that whole McDonald's thing. Freaking unbelieveably good. So what exactly is in that special sauce? Can you ask your grandma? She's home making Big Macs and Chicken McNuggets, right?"
Or this from a white person to a black person in the US: "Shaquille O'Neal? So where in Africa is that from? Are you of the famous O'Neal tribe of Zimbabwe or what? I learned a little Swahili, can I try it on you? Have you ever killed a lion?"
White folks, just look at it from that perspective and see how off-color your questions and comments are. And let us just have our little piece of the internet to laugh a bit about it. The whole "I'm white and I'm oppressed" bit doesn't go over very well. Sheesh.
Very well written and you made me laugh/smile! Thanks!
Your advice in this post is good, if it's geared towards people who are unworldly and mentally retarded.
Also, where did you go where people were so stupid? I live in the Seattle area and we have so many Asian Americans here that nobody would dream to be so unintelligent as to ask an Asian-looking person that they saw where they were from or tell them their English is good. Asians are by far the biggest minority here. Did you go to the deep south or something?
To kimchiguy, why do you bother ordering your food in Korean when you're at Korean restaurants in the first place? It's like you're just trying to show off that you speak Korean. I speak fluent French and some German and I would never order in French when I'm at a French restaurant in America because it's kind of... lame. No offense, but you have to admit there is really no point in you ordering in Korea other than a.) Trying to impress or b.) Practicing your Korea but if it's the latter, and you're familiar with east-asian culture, you should know that Koreans and Japanese people in their respective countries typically are weirded out by white people speaking their languages.
Also, why do you (The Korean) refer to yourself in third person instead of using pronouns? Makes you come across as a little bit full of yourself as if you're Confucius himself.
If people walk up to you and yell '안녕" at the back of your head and scream and run away, get back to us. There is no mockery implicit in the encounters you describe whereas in mono ethnic 민족 Korea foreign in considered humorous and worthy of derision. Whether this is borne of inferiority (most likely) or embarrassment (the standard Korean excuse, also see: 'shy') is immaterial.
lived here ten years married to a Korean, with two kids going through the education system with plans to live several years more. I've worked at some of the most prestigious schools in Korea, contributing to the development of the country in a positive manner. I've studied Korean at a major university in Korea. In that time I've joined several groups including the parents' group of my kids kindergarten and a hiking club, driven a piece of crap 1996 Daewoo Cielo as my first car, deflowered a couple of virgins, traveled the country, camped in Soraksan, hiked Odaesan and Halla San, never been arrested for anything, was the best man at a wedding, had my heart broken, drank too much soju, makoli at times etc., etc., etc. I've had the quintessential Korean experience with some Subway and Outback thrown in.
While I'm quite proud of my Canadian heritage, I'm also invested through and through in Korea, not because of any indoctrination, but simply because I have lived as Korean a life as you can imagine in the great Gangwondo.
While you may think the questions are innocent ("American person!", "You speak Korean so well", "You like Kimchi?" What you think Korean girl?" "You know Dokdo?" "You like spicy food?" "You use chopstick??"), it brings home the truth that no matter what, I will always be a foreigner and always standing in the margins. My experience is so far removed from some of these questions that these situations become opportunities to learn something about the person asking: that they are uneducated, that they may have led insulated lives, that they've never traveled, that they may possibly be a tiny bit racist, that they see me as an FOB ("Fresh Off the Boat" - bitch I'm wearing me a Hanbok!), that they can't get past the way my face looks.
So to say the experience of an Asian person living in the West is even remotely similar is just patently absurd. They have rights and freedoms I can only dream of. Me, I'll always be an English teacher and thought of as one. Suck it.
Mark,
Also, where did you go where people were so stupid? I live in the Seattle area and we have so many Asian Americans here that nobody would dream to be so unintelligent as to ask an Asian-looking person that they saw where they were from or tell them their English is good.
New York. Think of it this way -- it only takes 100,000 idiots out of the 8 million people city to annoy the hell out of Asian Americans, since we are few in number and get the same treatment over and over again.
Binko,
If people walk up to you and yell '안녕" at the back of your head and scream and run away, get back to us.
Trust the Korean -- that happened so many times he cannot even count. And "gonichiwa" and "ni hao" too.
To be sure, the point of this post is not about having a "who suffers more" pissing contest. It is about being annoyed at people's ignorance. And the Korean is certain that expats in Korea are annoyed by the same token.
There is something to be said about the pangs of being a perpetual foreigner that english_is_my_second_language describe. Certainly the types of annoyances described in the post add to that feeling. But again, the post is not a manifesto that we suffer more than others somehow.
Steroidmaximus: I could not agree with you more.
"Hi! Hi! Hello moto!"
"Nice to meet you!"
"I met you 3 months ago jun seo."
"My name is jun seo."
"Do you like kimchi? Do you like korean food?"
No lie, "You can use chopsticks well! You are genius!"
I put up with this and much more everyday, as well as older Koreans blatantly yelling at the "waegookin" to GTFO, or just constantly staring.
english_is_my_second_language: Do NOT say we don't "have it as bad as Koreans living in America." Bullshit. Some people treat us like exhibits at a fair; regardless, there are more respectful and nicer Koreans, just as there are more respectful and nicer Americans; the difference is, Korea is a homogenous society, whereas America is a melting pot. Understand?
Again, this point is not about having a pissing contest. If the following wasn't clear from the previous sentence, the Korean will make it clear:
SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT WHO SUFFERS MORE. There are plenty of other places on the Internet to do that.
Fair enough; how about we just go with this: There are ignorant people everywhere that will say ignorant things.
Also, if you are an expat who must vent on how you suffer in Korea as Korean Americans are in the U.S., check out the post that is immediately following this one -- one of your brethren already addressed most of your concerns.
I have been to North Korea once so I have a fair idea of how they differ from South Koreans in terms of appearance (darker skin,more formal dressing and a host of other things).
Just thought The Korean might want to know that some North Koreans are sent over to China to pursue their education. It's an opportunity the government gives to some of their bright students. They do of course have to come back home on holidays and when they're done with their education. Also, I distinctly remember seeing some North Korean expatriates having brunch at a hotel in China. They also have to report back home and for some reason, all the North Koreans I saw at Pyongyang airport had duty-free bags. No idea if that's supposed to be them showing off that they've been across the border.
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