Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Ask a Korean! Wiki: Are Korean Men Into Black Women?

Dear Korean,

I'm 19 and live in the United State and very attracted to korean men such as TOP and Taeyang form big bang,Kim Bum, Kim Hyun Joong, ant etc., I thought of moving to South Korea after college. I've been learning the language but I wonder do korean like black girls. My features are european for the most part and I am light skinned such as Lee Hyori and Park Shiyeon but I and black. So I'm asking you for and answer...please don't give me it depends on the person it crap!

Sheena



Dear Korean,

I just have this attraction towards Asian men. And some seem to like me too. But ive never dated one. So would they feel insecure dating a black girl? Well would you?

Debbie



Dear Korean,

I actually have several questions, but all of them revolve around the "Blasian" relationships. I just want to know why Asian men don't approach Black women. You know how the trend is now: White women w/ Black men, Asian women w/ White men... etc, that leaves Black women and Asian men alone...... I'm personally attracted to Asian men but I can't get them to notice me. I've been 'hit on' by every ethnicity except Asian men. They either stay within their own ethnicity or date white women. I know that me being African-American maybe somewhat of a disadvantage, yet I'm not like most black women, I'm not loud, "ghetto" or vicious , I enjoy watching anime< esp. subbed>, listening to Kpop / Jpop music and studying Asian cultures. I don't have many black friends because they can't appreciate my unique, non-Black interests. Are Asian men just not interested? Is it true that Asians are scared of Black women? What can I do? What do Asian guys look for in girls?

AW


The most frequently received question for this blog is some variation of "Do Korean guys go for non-Korean [white, black, Latina, South Asian, Southeast Asian, Martian] girls?" And each time, the Korean points them to this old post, which has been the most popular post on this blog for a long time until the dog meat post overtook it this month. (But, for the record, the third most popular post is about what the word "oppa" means -- which is another mainstay for those infatuated with Korean men.)

But over the course of receiving hundreds of such questions, the Korean noticed a trend: by far, black women were dominating the number of questions about whether Korean/Asian men would find them attractive. So the Korean figured this is a good topic for a separate discussion. Why do black women have such yellow fever? Was Ninja Assassin somehow much more culturally influential than people give it credit for? Are black women into small eyes? Or is it just that black women are more inquisitive? More insecure? And on the flip side, for Korean/Asian men -- are you interested in dating a black woman? Do you talk to black women when you go out?

Here is the only reliable bit of research about black-Asian relationship that the Korean knows of. (If you know more, you are obviously welcome to pitch in.) Among all Asian Americans, Korean American men (who are raised in America) are actually the most likely to marry a black woman. This, however, is not really saying much, as only 2.1% of Korean American men (raised in America) are married to black women.

Personally, back when the Korean was still dating, he was an equal opportunity dater. But he always did have a soft spot for black women. To the Korean, the most beautiful woman in the world (excluding, of course, the Korean Wife) is Beyonce. (Yes, the Korean knows Beyonce is biracial. Let's not get too technical. He also cannot stop staring at Alicia Keys whenever she is on TV. That good enough?) He also asked out a decent number of black women during the course of his dating life -- only to be rebuffed each time. God, it's great being married so I won't go through that shit again. Wait, did I say that out loud?

At any rate, let's talk about this. Black women, Asian men, now is your time.

Got a question or a comment for the Korean? Email away at askakorean@gmail.com.

53 comments:

  1. Well obviously as a white, married male I am completely an outside perspective on this but in my experience from talking to my foreign female friends in both Korea and Japan, be they black, white or any color they have difficulty getting men here to approach them outside of Korean-Americans or those who spent significant time abroad. This.seems especially true out in the provinces where I live. Those who made successful relationships with Korean men took a lot of persistence and patients on their part (really that's probably true of any cross-cultural relationship)

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  2. These questions have a common theme: they are focusing on Korean men as a monolith instead of thinking of specific men that they have met or may meet in their lives. Certainly, with that cited 2.1% of Korean American men married to black women, we know that those relationships do occur—plus, that’s only counting marriages; there are couples who are still in the dating stage. Why not focus on that guy in your class or meet up with a local Hallyu fan club (or start one), to begin to form a relationship with an individual rather than look for reassurances that Korean men will date black women. There are cultural hang-ups about interracial dating and American culture does not offer a lot of positive messages about how black women are perceived as dating partners (the oft cited, lowest marriage rates among women in America and the awful comment sections that follow those articles; see WSJ “An Interracial Fix for Black Marriage”). However, if you can get to know someone in a low-stakes setting (a place where forming friendships is primary focus—not a bar) then the odds of finding a guy who will see you as a person whom he likes, and not seeing your race only, is better. That said, that standard should be applied to oneself—seek the guy whom you like as a person, not as a Korean man only and not the guy who just reminds you of an entertainer.

    As a personal aside, I’m a biracial (black/white) woman dating a Korean American man. His Korean background was not something I sought out; the relationship just started because we liked chatting at work. I made the first move to ask him out. He could have said ‘no’ and maybe I would have made the generalization that Asian men are not interested in dating black women. The only way to get a sufficient answer to the above questions is to put effort into making a relationship happen. Then your experiences will give you the answers that you’ll stand by, regardless if they are positive or negative.

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    1. I was hoping there would be a reply like this, thank you haha. I dated a Chinese American guy and I constantly got asked by black women how I "got" an Asian guy...as if I was seeking one out. It doesn't always work out like that. If you limit your options to a specific ethnicity of guy the results might be disappointing.

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  3. Interesting,I personally never was sexually attracted to native African women. Moreover, light and mostly European doesn't really count.

    It all comes down to preference, traditionally in Korea, the "whiter the better" mentality exists.

    Nevertheless, this view is being altered. It's simple really, the majority in Korea compliment me for my skin, whilst the European counterpart recommend me to "get a tan."

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  4. My 5'10" model-good-looks, dancer-bodied sister (who is African-American) came to visit me in Korea--in conservative Daegu, no less. She was hit upon by all (as she is in the states). The only difference was that a large number of Korean men found themselves confused by their attraction to her. One of my husband's friends called her his "Black Pearl" and proposed within minutes.

    Back to what the Korean has said on this topic for ages now: Korean men are men first (usually), and Korean second. My caveat is that while attraction holds fewer racial bounds, marriage and relationships are culturally loaded. Will Korean men dig hot black women in much the same way they dig hot women of any kind? Yes. Will they marry/date them? Depends on the guy.

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    1. I love that you put her height. I plan to study abroad and I'm African-American and 5'9.5" so I've been worried about going but this makes me feel better. =D

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  5. Um, ok. I'm a black woman. I've dated Asian guys, including a Korean. I've also dated Black, White and Latino guys. So not only have I seen this question before, I've *asked* this question before on some level. Even so, my first response is...weird weird weird. I mean, the reality is that men like women. If a man, of any description, likes a woman, of any description...then he does. In my experience, race isn't a major factor if there's a genuine attraction and similar values.

    I mean, really, it's a huge turn-off for black women when a non-black guy swaggerjacks our culture and announces a preference for black women and wonders if we're interested. It's no less creepy when it's a black woman doing the same sort of thing.

    I wonder if it is about insecurity...I notice that two of the three askers featured in the blog post made a point of saying how different they were. *rolls eyes* European features? Non-black interests? Whatever. Some people just aren't settled in who they are and want to escape...it's not a phenomenon exclusive to black women, but for at least two of those questions, it just seems like they're in a process of trying to prove how different they are from other black folks.

    The thing is--it really *does* depend on the person. The only Black woman I know married to an Asian man...is married to a Korean--BECAUSE they met through mutual interests, none of which were anime or kPop. And the only Asian man I've ever met who had a blatant and obvious preference for Black women is Korean, and very happily pursued women who don't have anything even vaguely European about their features...but he only got serious with the ones who are educated and have strong cultural and family roots and ultimately married someone who was also Korean.

    This whole reverse-fetishism thing that some black women develop towards "exotic" seeming men is for the birds, basically. It's one thing to have an attraction or a preference, it's another to watch a few dramas and hear a few songs and decide that chasing Asian men makes you a "special" black person.

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  6. Wild guess: black women are pretty tall, at least taller than Asian or white females. And most men don t feel comfortable dating someone above their height. I say so because I'm pretty tall (and skinny) myself and found a lot of men somehow having an issue with my height

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  7. Alicia Keys is quadracial (black, scottish, irish, italian).

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    Replies
    1. actually the average white person is taller then the average black person

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  8. I think it all depends on the person ... not everyone is the same

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  9. It all depends on the individual. Honestly, if you want to discuss this with some opened minded ppl you can always log onto the site Black women and men united (BWAM). I went on there initially to find men that were interested in Black women but, I actually met some great ppl on the site that had the same interest as I. They have great forum chats and even encourage interracial dating of all nationalities. I have seen this questioned ask MANY times on the site but, what I have come to realize is that race shouldn’t matter. What I can say is many men on the site feel that black women are intimidating. Also many complained that the women on the site where only trying to date them because, of what was portrayed in manga or Asian based television shows. Many of the delusional women didn’t know the difference between reality and television (:-/). Instead it was like an obsession and many men were put off by that.

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  10. Well why wouldn't Korean men go for black women? It's just a matter of chemistry and attraction. Those things don't really pertain to race. The Korean said he was interested in a few black girls before he got married. Isn't that evidence enough that they do go for them? It just depends on the guy. Korean guys are not all cut from the same cloth you know. They are all individuals with their own set of preferences. I dated two different Korean men, one guy for two years in high school and the other for six months in college. They were nothing alike in personality or even appearance for that matter. The only thing they had in common is that they were both Korean. Also getting along with a Korean guy's parents is no big deal either they are not anymore intimidating than any other guy's parents. At least that was my experience.

    Oh and Dan Bae, Alicia Keys is biracial. Scottish, Irish and Italian are all of the Caucasian race.

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  11. Girls, you have "yellow fever", of a specifically Korean-leaning kind. This is racist.
    People are attracted to certain looks and cannot really help that. If asian looks attract you, you can't help that.
    But thinking someone will be the guy for you, just because he's from a certain country-- dismissing guys from any other country-- that is a gross generalization, just like the gross generalization that "most" black women are "loud, "ghetto" or vicious". As a black woman myself, it's really heartbreaking to hear a young black woman saying such things. I hurt not for myself, because I know the truth. I hurt for you.
    Asking a blanket statement like, "Do Korean guys go for black women? Or are they racist?" Is like asking, "Do all black people love basketball and watermelon?"
    Plenty of Korean people are open minded and not racist! Yes, even native Koreans, living in Korea! Case in point: my husband and his family, who welcomed me with open arms.
    But if you pursue a guy thinking that he is going to conform to some pre-conceived fantasy you have based on pop stars and actors, you are going to be gravely disappointed, and the guy is going to be seriously turned off, and well he should be.

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  12. Some blogs people might be interested in.

    By black women living in Korea:

    http://alexx-in-wonderland.tumblr.com/

    http://brittinbusan.tumblr.com/

    Both of whom are friends of mine and both of whom have not exactly spent their years here loveless! Alex in particular has written some good posts specifically on what it's like to be a non-white foreigner in Korea.

    Also this blog, written by a black American woman engaged to a Korean man. She is also step-mother-to-be to his two children from a previous marriage and writes some really insightful bits in general also about the prospect of marrying into a Korean family.

    http://blasianlovebox.tumblr.com/

    Enjoy!

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  13. Well. I suppose you just have 2 'put yourself out there, and see what happens'.

    My exboyfriend is Korean, and I'm a black girl. I don't think in particular that he had anything against dating outside of his race, even if it meant dating a black girl, although it might of course have been unusual. ^^ All I know is that he really liked me. Too bad it didn't work out in the long run.

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  14. Oooo.. and I agree a 100 % with gloveslap. ^^

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  15. The problem is your asking the WRONG question and I see this everywhere. I feel like when an Asian guy thinks black woman the first image that comes to mind is some aunt Jemima living in the ghetto. Instead we should be asking are Korean men(or asian men in general) into Hot,attractive, undeniable gorgeous black women? If that were the question I would say yes.

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  16. i have always had this attraction to koreans, japanese and other asians. but I wondered do they like black girls? Im o a diet right now because I weigh 196 need to be perfect for my asian boyfriend when i get one. the boys at my school considered that fat so im trying to loss weight and im losing it too finally. But the second reason why i question my chances with a asian guy is because im tall like 5''8 and my mom says that i probably wont stop grow until i hit college so i wonder is there any tall asian guys out there 4 me?

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  17. I would like to first post a correction response to whom the Korean finds most attractive. I'm not surprised it was thought to be so, but Beyonce is NOT biracial, however Alica Keys is. Yes, I'm sure no one really cares but that misinformation was slightly unsettling for rather than asking, people always assume the same about me. Like I can't be beautiful without being biracial. Oh, I understand, it's "becauseimblack". It's like Diana Sung said in her post:"...found themselves confused by their attraction to her." I believe assuming a black women is of mixed race is a way to justify personally having any type of attraction to her.
    I'd like to also state it takes a secure being to date outside their race ,because an insecure one would never last in that relationship.

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  18. i was wondering the same question but it shouldn't really matter if all of them like me cause i know some will all men are men some like curvy girls some like skinny some like athletic some like fat so i'll let fat hand me the type of guys that like curvy girls and ill go from their i narutofanart what is wrong with you ddon't get into shape for a guy do it for yourself and yes their are tall koreans their the tallest in asian race well as far as i see in new york and dont think if he's this race he'll be perfect no race is prefect and girls stop trying to put down your race if your black love it it's only american blacks that act as stupid as that and not all do. I'm biracial to hell more white and spanish then i am black but i appreciate my black more cause of how STRONG our women are if your look black people are gonna say your black whether your more indian are white accept the way you look n like a guy for his looks are personality not his race

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  19. Speaking in the chinese community, I find my parents and my friends who are not kind to the most at heart, has a sterotypical image on why they just don't like blacks. The reason is they have a sterotypical image that they are more aggressive, stubborn, dirty and a gold digger. But recently a african woman approach me, I kindly accepted her and I am starting to see disorders in my community. I think dor dating goes its fine, but for a serious relationship, then there is a problem, mine is reaching into a serious point.

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  20. Go buy kpop or jpop shirts and bags and wear them out! That's what I do and their faces are hilarious "omo you like ______?" ^-^ fighting:)

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    1. I LOVE THIS COMMENT TOO FUNNY OMO IT DO BE FUNNY "AJAH FIGHTING" ^___^

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  21. Oh The Korean, this post only confirms that I never should have stopped reading this site. ;)

    For the black girls out there obsessed with Korean boys--and please don't send me a private message after reading this because too many of you already have--what Diana E. Sung said about her sister's experience pretty much sums things up. I've lived in Korea for going on 4 years now and am just as single as when I first came here. Part of that is because I want to get MARRIED--not just date--and I'm over the magical age of 25.

    I can only speak for things IN Korea, because I didn't hang out with Korean guys back in the States, but I think if you're young and cute-ish you shouldn't have any problems finding Korean boys who'll be interested in dating you. (Cute is THE calling card of the female gender in Asia. Without it, I suppose money might suffice?)

    Honestly, as the others have pointed out, everyone's attracted to everyone at some level or another BUT when relationships get more serious, that's when things tend to fall apart. In nearly four years of living here, I've known of exactly five black women married to Korean men. Yes, just five. (But two single girls with black-Korean babies.) Likewise, I can only think of about 10 white women married to Korean guys that I know personally. (And one divorced white woman with a half-korean baby.) It's tough out here for a non-Asian girl! lol

    I've gone on dates with a few Korean guys here. They're no more _____________ than any other guys. They just come with different cultural baggage. ;)

    My advice is to be open to meeting fabulous people! No offense to Korea/ns but the world is a big place. Don't limit yourself.

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  22. Hi~
    I am korean dude married and worked in europe and married with european
    It seems It passed a bit of time so iam nor sure that you see this comment.
    Anyway.. It`s shame to admit we are a bit--;; racist.
    But We are passionate and honeset(at least honested in asia..I thk)

    But I have acquintence friend of my pal
    married with black chick and live well.
    Also Be careful like the other man also there are bunch of scumbbacks among korean dudes
    Just wanna enjoy.. youknow.
    So um......
    I advise you first be honest and pretend that you do not have much sexual experince
    and be passionate... --;; um
    Well It`s a bit weired I think We are still more resposible for woman I mean try to support family and when Gf got pregant= marry not abandon...
    Voca al lupo ragazzina
    Ciao~

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  23. Hi - I'm a Korean-American who grew up In Orange Country. All very homogenous countries tend to rascist to a degree and after quite a bit of traveling, I noticed that people can be quite racist without a hint of malice. Having said that, as a kid growing up, my parents were maliciously racist. I got my ass kicked for verbally fighting back against my parents when they found out I was dating a hispanic girl in Junior High. I consider those experiences battle scars and consider it my right to have the freedom to date whoever I please.

    All things considered, I love black women. They are very sexy. I dated a Harvard grad who definitely kept me on my toes--but we didn't end up together mainly because we were too similar. We both LOVE being right.

    The hot temper thing is bull shit. It is a weird korean-racist thing that a lot of my Chinese-American friends harbored. They told me their mothers told them never to marry a Korean man because they will beat you. I can honestly say I don't know any Korean who beats their wives, my Dad and his brothers included. I would also argue that that are FAR more Chinese men who beat their Chinese wives then Korean men who beat their Chinese wives. See! I love being right.

    Anyways - when I like I girl, I'll go right up to you and say hi. I flirted with a lot of black girls in Oakland when I lived there and was pretty successful.

    Will I every marry a black girl. Absolutely. But I don't care what my parents think if I love the girl. I'm sure there are authentic Korea-born, Korea-raised Korean men like that out there.

    BTW, it is ok to love Korean men. We are pretty fucking sexy. :)

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  24. honestly, i dont think its good for korea (being divided and under threat as a nation) to be inter-racially mixing too much. Hapas tend to have major identity issues and most tend to reject their weaker cultural side. Most asian and non-asian relationships end up with the kid not speaking the language nor really identifying with being asian anymore, so its a loss of culture. No offense but whites and blacks in America have already lost their culture so they dont really care much. I say no to the assimiliation under white hierarchy and yes to staying 'Han'. I'm a Korean girl and I only date Korean boys, there are levels to who I am as a person that I can never share with the same familiarity as with another Korean.

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    1. lol.......thats def called racism

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    2. WELL THATS A BIT RACISTS I THINK U MIGHT BE ONE OF THE GIRLS IN KOREA THAT CAN TURN ON A FRIEND AIGOOO

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    3. This isn't racism, this is plain logic. Props to you, MCK, you're definitely much more respectable than any black girl who's Asian-wannabee because of how hype the K-Pop is (way to take the worst of a culture, by the way).
      Actually, MCK, you're transcending your own selfishness for the good of your country, and this is very admirable.
      Do not listen to the others acting overly shocked at your opinions.

      Cultures, traditions and people must be protected in order to be carried on. To do that, they shouldn't be mixed with each other. It's been like this for centuries, it worked, it should stay this way.

      But, of course, "progressivism" just wants everyone up to be mixed, because it's so cool to have multi-racial babies (meanwhile, divide to rule).

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    4. i think what you've said is bs and need to be look upon by a doctor and stop being so bitchy think of love and not of tradition who the hell goes by tradition in these day I infact like Korean men and if this is how its gonna be I will fight for my love!!!! stop being a rain cloud your just raining on peoples sunny day :p

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    5. There is a difference between preserving one's culture and staying ignorant to other cultures. At any rate I get sick of people just throwing around the term racist. Most times those loaded comments fall more under bigotry and prejudice than racism.

      Definition of RACISM
      1
      : a belief that race is the primary determinant of human traits and capacities and that racial differences produce an inherent superiority of a particular race
      2
      : racial prejudice or discrimination


      Definition of BIGOT
      : a person who is obstinately or intolerantly devoted to his or her own opinions and prejudices; especially : one who regards or treats the members of a group (as a racial or ethnic group) with hatred and intolerance

      Definition of PREJUDICE
      1
      : injury or damage resulting from some judgment or action of another in disregard of one's rights; especially : detrimentto one's legal rights or claims
      2
      a (1) : preconceived judgment or opinion (2) : an adverse opinion or leaning formed without just grounds or before sufficient knowledge

      b : an instance of such judgment or opinion

      c : an irrational attitude of hostility directed against an individual, a group, a race, or their supposed characteristics

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  25. MCK wow! what year is it and folks are still saying hot mess ish like that?

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  26. Heyyy, people~ Ive actually been absolutely in LOVE with Asian guys...especially Japanese and Korean guys.. and Im 100% African-American. But I keep running into Asian guys who find me unattractive because of my skin color. Its been making me very upset so far because, I love their culture and have been studying Japanese and Korean so I could visit their country one day. Im a hardcore otaku, a kdrama fan, and a lover of kpop, jpop, and jrock. I cant explain why im so attracted to asians, but i just am. Asian guys so far just dont like me.. I even ran into this Korean guy who kept calling me racial slurs, and saying that he was from the kkk and out for my family, and that I should die because I look like an ugly man. Sad face. I was really depressed from that. :( So Ive been pondering this question of 'Do Asians (Mainly Koreans) Actually Like Black Women?' for a long time. Aside from that, about racisim- media ticks me off. I havent seen a good show yet, where the black people arent loud, or obnoxious.. We are NOT all like that, just shown to be because of the few of us who act up. I personally, really want to have an interracial child and teach that child about both cultures, and languages of me and the father. Truthfully, I feel that if the world, opened their minds to study different culture...theyll find that its very intresting, and were all just humans with different styles. Culture and language is an amazing thing, and more people just need to realize that a person is defined by who they are as an individual- not as a race. We define ourselves.

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    Replies
    1. It's fine for you to be attracted to whomever floats your boat. It is however, not fine to be self-deprecating because of that attraction. Perhaps you're not liked because they can sense the self-esteem you seem to be lacking.

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  27. THEY DON'T CARE ABOUT WHAT COLOUR YOU ARE AS LONG AS YOU ARE PRETTY !

    Trust me, saying" I am not like the others, I am not loud ,rude and I listen to kpop jpop or watever" is a huuuge turn off !! Don't bring your own race down to make yourself stand out .. This is just stupid !

    I also read someone said, " Iam light skin" REALLY ??!! Who cares about your shade of black ... You could be "light skin"and extremly ugly .. Honest I am black Not veeery dark, not veery light just black and personally I get told that I'am very pretty by loads of asian Girls AND boys ^^

    Just stop trying to act cute, dress cute or wathever .. Just start really take care of yourself and accept yourself I am black And proud :D

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    Replies
    1. Exactly... these self loathing comments are just ridiculous.

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  28. Don't be afraid to assume your roots your culture.You will meet some openminded people with whom it could work, but with some others they could be not receptive. On my part i'm a black girl and VERY proud of that! Precisely i'm African and it's a bit amazing to see how much some people could be ignorants. I grew up in Africa (Cameroon)but we are very open minded there and really curious about the whole world. It's pitty when some people say "you're A georgeous African woman!" or "you're the most beautyful African girl i ever seen in my life"! Lool! I just want to say, shut up! Buy a flight ticket and go to see by yourself instead of saying stupid things.

    For the Korean girl who only date Korean guys!

    It's your right and your opinion but iot sounds racist because it's up to the parents to educate their children with both precious cultures. First of all "we don't choose the person you fall in love" and i don't know if you're christian or boudhist or what else but "God create us as his image, without any notion of races!".

    On my part i know that whoever i date African, american, asian or india, i will transmit my African culture to my kids.I will be very pleased to share my culture with my foreigner boyfriend or husband, and also to discover his.

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  29. I wouldn't worry about the number of times you were rebuffed TK. While black men frequently date outside of their race and have few (if any) issues with doing so, black women are often shamed by friends, family members and strange black men(loudly and in public)for doing the same. Issues of "loyalty" (you sold out, diluting the blood, blah blah blah) are often brought into the conversation(ie. confrontation). Whether they liked/were attracted to you or not, most likely they simply wanted to avoid the drama.

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  30. Beyonce and Alicia Keys are black...they're light skinned. Think back to the Cosby show. Just because a black woman has light skin doesn't mean she's biracial...*sheesh*

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  31. wish their was a like button on here!!! cuz theirs so many posts on here I can agree with... girl love who you are and no stop being so desperate and just take the risk of finding out for your self , go mingle the world is a huge place :D

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  32. It's like this. Have confidence in yourself and your charm! I don't ask myself "will a Korean guy want me?" because I attract all men no matter what race. First off everyone is dancing around this question and I'm going to be frank with you! It doesn't matter what race a guy is, if you turn him on he will date you! Now, the key word is DATE or "hook up with" because if he was born and raised in Korea, he more than likely will marry a Korean girl because of family pressure. If you want to Marry a Korean guy your best bet is in the U.S. The reality is... THEY DO FIND BLACK WOMEN ATTRACTIVE but they don't want to admit it! You know why all of a sudden black women seem to be interested in dating KOREAN men? Two words.... SUPER JUNIOR! Yep, they look at those 10(or 13) guys and think "Dang, Donghae or Siwon, or Heechul, Eunhyuk etc. is so cute, I wonder if he'd go for me?) Well guess what, NO ONE CAN ANSWER THAT BUT THEM! Also, don't stress race so much, if you want a guy just because he's Korean, then thats a problem. Dont get so hung up on the outside appearance. If you want a Korean guy, be yourself thats it!

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  33. And here I thought the attraction was because of Rain and Boys Over Flowers...

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  34. It can't be denied that a lot of the attraction to Korean men may have been initiated by kdramas. One cannot help but be attracted to their sense of honor dedication,modesty,devotion and passion. One also cannot help but be drawn to the love triumphs in the end despite the adversity etc etc Especially when western tv is flooded with selfish desires and aspirations,careless love etc ...
    But to address the issue at hand you can never know their interest until you know. Everyone has preferences there are black men who won't date black women etc etc . There are so many different ppl in the world and making a choice on a genarilization may leave u terribly disappointed . Marrying a black man won't ensure that I can express my "blackness"( whatever that is ) to him comfortably and vice versa. The world is and has opened up and so should we . We need to look past race etc and look at core values and attraction .Because ur Korean and you get a Korean will mean he is Korean minded

    I don't believe that by simply marrying or intermixing automatically culture is lost. Its each persons responsibility to ensure their culture is passed on . There are many persons who ensure to teach their children their culture no matter where they live or whom they marry .. Culture only gets lost when you loose it.
    If a guy can't love you for who you are makes no sense whether korean, african , white etc. Doesn't make sense to change who you are either. U may end up changing until you don't recognize yourself no more ..

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  35. well being half African half white girl and i had previously dated an Asian guy ' Japanese ' i will mostly say it depends on the person himself my boyfriend was from very liberated society since he was born and raised in the states while i come from a very conservative beliefs, it was not surprising when it did not work out .
    so most of the times i think the culture is very important factor in the dating process of course after initial attraction which is the key factor its as simple as this : some men like girls with dark skin while others will prefer pale complexion its all about preference, then comes personalities.
    so don't like someone because they are from specific race or just because you like kpop culture that does not make sense, cause not everything you see on TV is what you will get in real life ...

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  36. Since it was mentioned in the comments, I just wanted to address the concept of "delusional kpop fans". The truth is that us normal kpop fans get drowned out by the squeals of delusional fangirls for the most part. Most of us know that pop culture of any culture is not real life. I think that people should be able to like what they like without getting stereotyped, and unfortunately, this is a common stereotype that gets pinned on us.

    (Sorry is this posts more than once -- Blogger had an error message whenever I tried to comment using other accounts)

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  37. I found this post because someone kept asking me if I fell into this category. I get it now. And I guess my folks just raised my siblings and I as "equal opportunity" daters. Anyways, Danke

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  38. Understand the "African" woman who speaks english is likely an African American woman who's history is deeply entrenched in over 300-years of abusive slavery and racism in a country that told them they were apes, animals, monkeys and chattel during that time. This county - among several others launched a global campaign (anti-color, Jim Crow, South African Apartheid and Minstrel Art) against dark skin since before the 1700's. If this frustrates you, that's your problem, but the reality is that people of COLOR - black women and black men have been ostracized and hated across the globe for hundreds of years. It has nothing to do with insecurity. It has everything to do with historical global hatred. Therefore, it's not unreasonable to ask this question if you are frequently the recipient of repetitive racism around the globe. Someone who has never been exposed to such repetitive, ignorant and unwarranted hatred wouldn't understand.

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  39. I guess Korean-owned beauty supply stores in the hood are excellent ways for a black woman to meet a Korean guy.

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    1. You got that right!! You think we just go for the hair? lol Actually, I'm natural and I make most of my own products, but when I want to practice my business Korean, so I can one day do BUSINESS WITH KOREANS who want to do BUSINESS WITH BLACK PEOPLE on a larger scale, yes, I do go to Korean-owned beauty supply stores.

      I bet that's not the type of response you were expecting, huh? You won't find many "ghetto" black women here who are uneducated, confrontational, and severely obese baby mamas who need anger management. Those types don't usually go for Asian men and Asian men don't usually go for them. They usually stick to black hood guys who pump them full of babies and bounce.

      Check your insecurities and check the stats. There are far more black women out there who prefer black men over Asian men. Why must you clown the small minority of us who are not afraid of trying different flavors? Some of us have highly sophisticated palates and sometimes we crave.........................the exotic. (cover your eyes children) Those of you women who have had a taste know exactly what I'm talking about. It's a totally different flavor. Once you go Asian, that's all you'll be cravin'. It's sounds corny, but it's the truth. It's a different experience. There must be something in the kimchi/dim sum/pho (etc.) because I can't get enough! And as far as the penis thing, I've learned that it doesn't matter how big or small your tool is, I just need to know if you're an apprentice or journeyman.

      Peace and love brotha.

      And for those of you ladies who only like Asian men because you have some pop fetish or you want a blasian baby, please find a hobby. That fetish will wear off at some point. Oh, and I don't know many Asian men who are interested in looking like flower boys. Seriously, find a hobby.

      I've been attracted to Asian men my ENTIRE life, but I only dated black guys because I thought it was the right thing to do. I love black men, but we're just not compatible. You can't force things. Ever since I started dating Asian men (finally), there is no longer a dark cloud hovering above me. No pun intended.

      Good luck!

      Delete

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